Board Thread:General Discussion/@comment-27219200-20151115021519/@comment-3554523-20151230045236

Le Dernier Vache wrote: Look, the simple fact is, we all know that Reyna and Buford the table are the golden couple. How can anyone compare to this majestic piece of flying furniture whose very limbs and plies of wood are the very sinews of Olympian ingenuity and possess even more passion and stamina then Ares and Aphrodite on a Friday night. His smooth mahogany exterior shows his virtuous path in life, striving to reflect honest, compassion and modesty. His polished legs are testament to the Heraclean strength that he possesses and no foe can stand before his mighty legs. His bronze base symbolizes chastity and loyalty, and further highlights his compassion and how he is, physically and figuratively, a support for people in need. Finally his high quality steam vents signifies advancement, the far-sighted vision that he possesses and his ambition to do good. How can one deny this match that was truly made in heaven, this divine couple were always meant to be. It is absolutely ludicrous and truthfully, heretical that any other unholy and ungodly "pairing" would be suggested other than these two. You heathen, scoundrel, barbarian, how dare you suggest this vile filth?! CLEARLY Festus and Annabeth were meant to be. As Belle had her beast, so too will Annabeth fall in love with this noble automaton who's faithfully guarded CHB for so long. At first they'll be like two magnets with the dipole moment and they'll repulse. But later, as they get to know each other, Annabeth will see how weak and pathetic Percy is and that all she needs is a good strong man-dragon, and an automaton at that. 6-pack? Pathetic. Try a 200 iron-pack. Powers that are about as powerful as a squirt gun and farting on the earth to make it rumble? WEAK. THIS DRAGON WILL CRUSH ALL IN ITS WAKE AND BRING HELLFIRE AND DAMNATION! He is intensely loyal and caring, as seen through his faithful service to the Heroes of Olympus. He has patience, as seen over his decade long vigil over the perilous forests of Camp Half Blood. And most importantly, he has a spot in Annabeth's heart, having helped to guard the forest and Thalia for years. Man and machine...the next step for humanity and clearly the better match here.